
Hi, I'm Keith, and I'm a social media addict.
I know, because I've seen this before.
When I was around 8 years old, my father was a smoker, and I'd regularly see him leave family meals early to have a quick smoke, leaving us to finish our lunch or dinner without him. It was just something smokers did.
Today, I'm not physically leaving the table like my father, but my mind is just as disconnected, as my attention moves from eating to being fixated on my iPhone.
At least my father would finish his meal before he did his smoking routine, I typically pick up my phone mid-way through, and stay on it right to the end of dinner. Sometimes gobbling down unknown quantities of food while my eyes remained glued to some insufferable post on social media.
I could be talking to my wife, or asking my daughter how her day at school was. Instead I'm mindlessly scrolling the feeds and timelines hoping for something to catch my attention, while the two most important people in my life, remain neglected -- while they're right in front of me!
Clearly something was wrong.
I noticed this on airplanes too, at the end of a long flight, Smokers would make a bee-line for the smoking area to satisfy their craving. But phone-addicts immediately light up the cabin with the glow of their screens, the moment the pilot announces "you may now switch on your electronic devices".
At least smokers were denied their addiction for the entire duration of their flight, usually hours -- phone addicts (like me) had only to endure the 20 minutes of landing.
I saw this in myself a few months ago, late one night, I had binged on all my social media, YouTube, Reddit, Twitter, Facebook, and after completely exhausting all possible posts on all platforms, I'd cycle through them again, and again and again!
I should have been sleeping, it was late -- very late! I knew I should be dozing off, but instead my phone was firmly in my hand, with my finger scrolling through every last nook and cranny.
I was craving something (what exactly I didn't know). I knew there was nothing interesting left (I'd checked, multiple times!) -- but I was still scrolling, and scrolling...hoping for something interesting to magically pop into the feed. This activity gave me no joy, but I was doing it anyway.
I was addicted -- social media was my slot machine -- and though I was losing, I couldn't help but want to play more.
All hallmarks of addiction.